I haven’t felt inspired to write anything since the wedding. I’ve been too anxious about Jon’s release to concentrate.
A friend said, “Surely, you mustn’t feel as distressed now that his homecoming is so close.”
“I feel worse,” I said. “The closer it gets, the more anxious I’ve become about it all going wrong.”
He looked surprised as I reminded him that we’ve been trying to secure a date for Jon’s release for at least six months, and prior to that over the five and a half years he’s been inside we’ve never felt secure that it would all go ahead. It’s the uncertainty that cracks you up.
We’ve had more positive news this week, which has prompted me to get blogging again.
Copyright © 2007 Barbara Attwood
2 comments:
One of my favorite songs from the peace and love era of the 60's is the famous words of Ecclesiastes put to music by the Byrds (I think!)-to everything, there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven. It has been my experience that this is inevitable, as the turning leaves or spring buds on the trees. Your family is entering a new season and nothing will stop it. When fear of the future strikes, I try to look back and remind myself, all that has happened up to this point will have it's conclusion no matter what. I don't see the need for imprisonment to continue-it's purpose is fulfilled no matter what else does happen.
Perhaps reflecting on your CBT sessions at this time might help. Sit in your garden, do some Tai-chi... reflect on the fact that whatever you do - it's going to progress (whether good or bad). You're worrying about the situation hurts your health, it worries your family, it comes to no good. :(
At least you know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. He is close to that end. Let that warm you. Embrace it.
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